So many people assume that since J and I are divorced we would love to sit and talk shit about each other. We don’t...at least not most of the time. Honestly if we’re venting, we just need somebody to listen. Not stir the pot on their own accord.
From the very beginning we would both get messages with updates about the other person. I ended up totally deleting all of my social media accounts because I was tired of the nosy bitches who just wanted to watch as my life took a big turn.
Even over a year later, we still get the same messages. So what do we do about it? I can’t speak for J but I try to take the stance that we are united in parenting and what he is doing in his personal life isn’t any of my concern. The only thing that really matters is that he is a good dad and always has our kids best interest at heart. I believe that he does.
No we don’t always see eye to eye on everything, we have different styles of parenting and goals for our lives. I personally think that as long as our kids needs are met and they are thriving, it’s fine that our parenting styles differ. We talk about the big things; like discipline and consequences, what’s going on at school, what seems to really be working with getting them to complete chores and homework, & routines that seem to keep us organized. We also talk about what doesn’t work. We are all inclusive in the aspects that involve our kids but otherwise we try to give each other privacy.
Maybe as time goes on we will share more of what’s going on in our adult lives but for now, while we are learning new boundaries, letting wounds heal and getting through the day to day, this is what works for us. As always I’d love to hear how this aspect of co-parenting works for you!
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